Homebirth Talk: The Real Reason to Choose Homebirth

Why aren't more women choosing to give birth at home?

Currently, only a very small percentage of informed women choose to have a homebirth. Even highly educated women, who seem aware of their options, often elect to have natural births. So what is keeping them from wanting what I consider the "optimum" birth experience?

There are studies touting safety-showing homebirth is just as safe, if not safer than hospital birth- if that's the concern. There is all kind of support, if you look for it, and birth stories and birth videos to get a peek at what it might really be like. If you ask the right people in your community, you can find out who the homebirth midwives are and interview them, ask them about all your questions and concerns. But why aren't most women doing these things? Why do they just choose the default option, hospital birth?

So, if the "facts" about homebirth are convincing and available, it seems to me that women are choosing hospital birth from an emotional, instead of practical viewpoint. Women are more emotional it seems, at least compared to men, so this makes sense. What bothers me is that the "emotion" is fear. Let me back up here. I am not fearless in the face of pregnancy and birth. But I am not fearful.

Birth needs to be respected, not controlled. I view birth as a very miraculous process. But it does not always happen as we envision or want it to happen. On the flipside of birth is death, and that is something that must be respected as well. Because I respect birth, I do not and would not try to control it or relinquish the responsibility of my body or my baby to anyone else, regardless of the situation.

And that's why I truly believe that choosing a hospital birth is making a choice to relinquish your responsibility in birth. And my hunch is that many women choose this path over homebirth because the respect for birth is not there.

And ultimately, many women also do not want the responsibility that comes with birth.

You can't really rid yourself of this responsibility of course, but you certainly can transfer it, and this is my definition of hospital birth. But still I ask, why would any women want to transfer the responsibility of her own health and her baby's health to anyone else?

It really comes down to informed consent.

Informed consent does not mean you have to know it all, or that you can simply tune out things you'd rather not hear. It is about being provided all of the options and information you need to make your own decisions and your own choices. And that's the big difference between homebirth and hospital birth and also the reason I think most women choose the latter.

Many women simply aren't aware that informed consent exists. And many don't want to have to do the work to make their own choices and live with them. Instead, they choose what "the doctor says" over what their body is telling them to do. There is no place for this worse than in a birth setting.

I challenge you to ask yourself a few really hard questions during your pregnancy that only you know the answer to. For many women, the way to a homebirth comes after soul-searching and connecting with the innate ability we all have to give birth naturally and with minimal interference.

Here are some questions to ask: How do I view birth? What experiences have I had that have influenced this view?

Do I feel like I need "help" in having a baby?

Am I willing to truly accept the responsibility that comes with being pregnant, giving birth, being a parent, even when and especially when I cannot control every aspect of these things?

Am I considering birth choices simply to be socially acceptable? Is that important to me? Just how important is it to me to make a choice that everyone else agrees with?

So invest your time to learn about your options and learn about homebirth. Watch birth videos, home and hospital. Close your eyes and visualize what you want for your baby. What do you see?

The greatest power we are given in pregnancy and birth is the ability to examine our fears and make conscious choices. When you think you have gotten to the bottom of it for yourself, tell me what you think.

Do you respect birth? Is fear holding you back from a homebirth? If not, what is? I'd like to hear your thoughts.

About the Author

Maryn Leister is Founder and Publisher of Indie Birth, an online magazine devoted to homebirth, and natural living. Get your free subscription to Indie Birth and join the homebirth conversation.

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