Article Advise

submitted: Aug 16th 2008 | by: RayMengall | Total views: 2 | Word Count: 968 | |

One of the more difficult things to do in life is to write a eulogy. Examples of eulogies may help a little. Basically what you have to do is speak before a crowd about the deceased. Sound terrifying? Especially since your emotions are stopping you from thinking straight. Now you are expected to get yourself together enough to embark on writing the eulogy. You might find yourself thinking examples of eulogies would help.

Now first things first - breath deep, stop panicking, and by following simple step-by-step guidelines, you can absolutely do this. You can do a good job for the person you have just lost. Let's begin.

Such responsibility doesn't come easy. It probably feels like the most difficult job in the world at the moment - and one you don't want to do. But since the job is yours, and there will be others listening intently to every word you say, you don't just want to rewrite something you have found from examples of eulogies - you want it to be personal.

There is no set time frame for how long it will take to prepare a eulogy, or how long it should go for. It is an individual thing - it may take hours of researching information from others. Some things you might go to others for are:

1. Stories from other family members

2. Memories and stories from friends

3. Memories and stories from employers and co-workers

4. Neighbour's memories

5. Stories from other associates

Don't be surprised if this part of the process provides some comfort - finding out things about your loved one that until now you had no idea about.

While it's easy to get examples of eulogies and just reword them for your own use, would it not feel better to have the skill to write and deliver a very personal eulogy - both as a sign of respect for the deceased and for your listeners who are relying on you?

You do not need any great skill to be able to do this. All you have to do is complete each step individually, and at the end when you look back, you will see what a great job you have done. So off we go.

Once you have done any research you feel is necessary - if any - get yourself a pen and paper, or a computer, and lets start. The first thing to do is to make brief notes or general comments about what you want to talk about. This should be just simple terms such as a persons name, a place of employment, a town or suburb, periods of life eg childhood, teen years etc, social events, memberships, accomplishments, and other life events or memories. Just note form at this point is fine.

Next look back at your list, and place each point in order as you think they should go eg childhood events would come before adult accomplishments etc. It doesn't have to be perfect, just a rough order. Remember at this point you are doing great to get this far. You are doing the right thing by doing this properly, rather than just copying examples of eulogies from other people.

Next - take each point you have on your list, and expand it. You don't need to write an A grade essay - just enough to explain the point you want to communicate to others. Read the sentences back as you write them. Read them out loud. Read them out loud to the front door, to the back door, to the kitchen sink. Pretend you are reading it to a person. Did it sound right? If not repeat it out loud the way it should sound, then change your written sentence.

Sentence after sentence, it will all start flowing easily. When you have completed all of the sentences and covered all of the points you have made, return to the start and read it out again. You may discover one or two more changes. Don't worry at this point that you do not have an introduction or conclusion yet.

An introduction can be a tough one, but often a good way to start is by using the person's name, and a short comment, statement, or very short story about him/her. Maybe even mention what you will miss the most about the person.

Then you are only left with the conclusion. This usually consists of any other thoughts you have, Sometimes a poem can be used here, or a personal prayer or blessing.

One final check now is to read the whole eulogy back, just to ensure it sounds as you want it. You could read it to another person, a neighbour or friend who you trust to give you an honest opinion. You could also find a tape recorder and make a recording of you reading it. Then play it back. You can pick up for yourself anything that doesn't sound right. All that is left to say at this point is congratulations on the great job you have done. It does not matter have said, because you have not dragged something out of examples of eulogies, it is personal and what is in your heart and thoughts, and that is the only thing that counts.

You only get one shot at this, so some final points to remember are that a personalized message is more important than getting grammer, etc correct, and that you are doing this for your loved one, so do not be afraid to say what you feel is important, or of any emotion throughout it - that is what you are there for, to celebrate the life of the person.

About the Author

You're not alone and do not feel stuck if you just can't seem to "get it together". This might possibly be the hardest things you will ever have to do. There is lots more assistance available for you if you would like it. You can find it at www.funeral-eulogy-info.com

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